Still not sure...

....I still can't get used to the fact that I'm now living at Rainbow's End and yet I still don't really feel comfortable in Radiant.This is the closest thing to family really, even if I still don't really feel like I belong anywhere. Feels like something's missing... I just can't place it anymore, though.

Also brooding for some reason. Likely the fact that there are two youngsters here and I always connect more with little kids between infant and about 10. That was the best thing about being home for Christmas -- I got to see my newest baby cousin.

Maybe I should offer to babysit... It'd give me something to do beyond trying to figure out what classes I'm going to take at RIT...Since I think I'm going to stick around a while.... Have to poke at their tech majors...and I kind-of want to poke at magical theory and other metaphysics as a minor... Also maybe literature.

This is depressing. It probably doesn't help that I hole up in my room because I'm not sleeping well because I seem to be regaining nightmares. Old ones about rats and big lies and of course being a witness to murder. I hate my subconscious.